I’ve outgrown my old self

Osasikemwen Ighile
3 min readSep 3, 2024

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There’s a time in life when you wake up and realize that you’ve changed. The things you once couldn’t get enough of, the places you used to frequent, the way you spent your time — they all start to feel like they belong to someone else. I know this feeling well because I’ve been there. I used to thrive on being out in the world, always exploring, always connecting with people. My calendar was packed with events, meet-ups, and adventures that kept me energized and excited. The more, the merrier.

But some years ago, the constant need to be everywhere and with everyone started to lose its grip on me. Where I once found joy in the buzz of social gatherings and the thrill of new experiences, I now find peace in the quiet, in the stillness of my own company.

I’m still extroverted — I still enjoy being around people — but only with those I choose to let in. The crowds and constant activity no longer hold the same appeal.

Instead, I’ve discovered a new love for things that allow me to be with myself, to dive deep into my thoughts and recharge in ways that feel more meaningful. Reading, writing, spending time alone (spa dates, skincare sessions, dancing in my room, cooking at home, movie nights) — these have become my new sources of joy. I didn’t plan for this change; it just happened, naturally and without fanfare.

It’s not just about swapping parties for books or trading in social events for spa days, although I’ve done plenty of that. It’s about embracing the fact that who I am now is different from who I was before — and that’s perfectly okay. It’s about realizing that growth often means outgrowing old habits, old ways of being, and even old desires.

But this isn’t just about me. This kind of change is something many people experience at some point in their lives. Maybe you’re someone who used to love the hustle and bustle of life, always on the go, always surrounded by people. But now, you find yourself craving quiet, longing for moments that allow you to just be, without the noise and the rush.

Perhaps you’ve noticed that the things you once couldn’t live without no longer bring you the same joy. The nights out, the constant socializing — they might still be fun now and then, but they don’t feel as necessary as they once did. You start to appreciate the beauty of a slow morning, the satisfaction of finishing a good book, or the calm that comes with being in nature. These moments become your new favourites, the things that fill you up in ways that big events and busy schedules just can’t.

And that’s okay. It’s okay to outgrow your old self, to move away from the things that used to define you. It doesn’t mean you’re losing who you are; it means you’re becoming more in tune with who you’ve always been underneath it all.

This isn’t something to fear or resist. It’s a sign that you’re evolving, that you’re listening to what your soul needs at this point in your life. And if that means embracing solitude, diving into new hobbies, or simply slowing down, then so be it.

There’s no right or wrong way to be. If you’re feeling a pull towards something different, something quieter, something more reflective, trust it. Allow yourself to explore this new way of being without feeling guilty for leaving the old behind.

Outgrowing your old self is a natural part of life. It’s a testament to your growth, to your journey towards becoming the truest version of yourself. And while it might feel strange or even uncomfortable at times, it’s also incredibly freeing.

So, if you find yourself in this space, know that you’re not alone. Lean into the things that make you feel alive now, and don’t be afraid to let go of the things that no longer serve you.

Change is something to be proud of.

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Osasikemwen Ighile
Osasikemwen Ighile

Written by Osasikemwen Ighile

In the midst of life’s chaos, I find solace in the quiet moments of introspection and reflection.

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